Over the years, I have built quite a library. Some of these books I use in my practice and some I read for fun. I hope there will be something here which will help or inspire you.

SELF-DEVELOPMENT


Jeff Olson, The Slight Edge
A great book.  I quote this often.  Jeff Olson explains what he calls the success curve.  When we are doing the things which will take us to our goal we are on the success curve and when we are not, we are on the failure curve.  If we failed at that moment then we probably would feel differently about it but if your goal doesn’t hit you between the eyes at that moment, then failing is maybe not painful enough.


The Courage to be Yourself, A Woman’s Guide to Growing Beyond Emotional Dependence,
Sue Patton Thoele
This book gives us, as women, courage – the willingness to act even when frightened. She shows us that we already have courage having a baby, going to work day after day, sustaining our relationships. It takes courage to fall in love, be honest with ourselves, survive a loss, move away from home or share a fear with a friend.  In order to face our fear, we need to take risks. With the right attitude, we can experience risk as exhilarating and creative.  Through taking responsibility and making creative choices, we change and through change we grow.


The Power of Now, Eckhart Tolle
Essential reading for anyone who might be feeling weighed down by the past, or fearful of the future.  In the ‘Now’, the present moment, problems do not exist.  In the ‘Now’ we discover that we are already complete and perfect. It’s a simple concept, it’s a challenge to get to.


The Dance of Connection, Harriet Lerner PhD
Harriet Lerner is an internationally acclaimed expert on the psychology of women and family relationships. When we speak from the heart we long to be heard and we can all connect with an experience of feeling misunderstood or ignored. This book shows you how to be heard and communicate in a way that is true to who you are.  A gentle book with lots of examples of how not to communicate and how to communicate well.  How to find your authentic voice by clarifying what is important to you.

RELATIONSHIPS


Living Successfully with Screwed-Up People, Elizabeth B.Brown
Are you searching for lifelines to keep your balance in a relationship with a person who drives you crazy? Is there little consideration for your feelings or your needs? Then you need this book.  It gives insights into difficult relationships. Full of real-life stories, brief diagnostic tests and practical tools it will help you to assess your own unique situation and gain the confidence to live successfully in your relationships.


Why Men Don’t Listen and Women Can’t Read Maps, Allan & Barbara Pease
Allan Pease is the world’s foremost expert on body language and teams up with his wife Barbara to educate to us in the biological factors that make men and women so different.  The emphasis is on appreciating and understanding the differences rather than blaming or expecting our partners to be just like us.  Very funny, entertaining and informative.  A good read for couples in conflict or those that just want to understand each other.


Why Men Don’t Have a Clue & Women Always Need More Shoes, Allan & Barbara Pease
Allan & Barbara Pease provide us with another non-PC look at some of the issues that have confused men and women for centuries. Men will never understand women and women will never understand men.  And that’s the one thing that men and women will never understand.  If you read this book you will be well on the way.


Mars & Venus Together Forever, John Gray
A follow on from the well-known Men are from Mars Women are from Venus. Deepening the understanding that men and women are indeed different. Once we accept this fact we can learn ways to communicate in a way that our partner understands.  Full of practical exercises including ‘The seven secrets of lasting passion’.  This book will help you get what you want and give what your partner needs.


The Way of the Superior Man, David Deida
Some say David Deida really does understand how women want to be loved and others strongly disagree, saying he has outdated views and a dislike of women. It’s certainly a controversial read.  More spiritual than Why Men Don’t Listen… or Mars and Venus…. it asks men to think about their ‘yang’ state and asks women to be in their ‘yin’.  I have personally felt challenged by this book, felt angry reading it, disagreed, agreed, gone round in a circle and questioned my belief and views about intimate relationship. I have recommended this book to many people, some it has infuriated and some it has inspired.


Ultimate Communion, David Deida
Beautifully written, Deida looks at both men and women, our yin and yang energies and how we need to act and express ourselves to come together in balanced intimate communion. I cannot say it better than he.  If you are not delighted by a style of intimacy involving deep passion, deep devotion and a deep understanding of all three, then this book is not for you.


It’s a Guy Thing, An Owner’s Manual for Women, David Deida
If you have ever said – Why does he do that? then you need this manual.  Deida is a relationship expert and offers us his explanation of how we can overcome relationship pitfalls in an easy to read question and answer format.  This book will give you an insight into all the men in your life – friends, fathers, partners, sons and bosses.

 

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